Oregairu Vol 13 Chapter 8

    Chapter 8: As I pray, at the very least,
    that I won't make any more mistakes.


When would winter end? There weren’t many clear experiences I could draw from so far
so the days only somewhat were noticeable in their changes in temperature. But even so,
I  was  strangely  aware  of  the  turning  points,  probably  as  we  reached  milestone  after
milestone.

That’s why, the end of winter to me is probably today.

Yesterday,  I’d  shut  myself  away  in  my  room  all  day  long,  exchanging  mail  with
Zaimokuza, refreshing the SNS, thoroughly checking for any errors on the homepage; just
spending the day off completely restlessly.

Then  comes  the  Monday  that  opens  the  week.  The  Monday  everyone  detests.  The
Monday when problems that occur in the weekend gets reported.

Going to school, the classroom was filled with the atmosphere of a year’s end. Because of
the excitement from the season of graduation, the topics of conversations were mostly
about future courses, plans for the spring break, or even about the final tests. Excluded
from all the casual chats was me alone at my seat, just silently listening to it all.

What awaited was the after school chime.

Through  Yukinoshita  Haruno,  the  bait  had  been  spread.  The  prom  that  had  been
cornered  based  off  on  self-restraint  had  another  even  flashier  proposal.  The  subset  of
caregivers opposing the prom wouldn’t be able to overlook this information. Above all,
because their window of argument had already been established, they would probably
make their move faster than they did before; both today and tomorrow too.

And it seems that prediction wasn’t all that off the mark.

When the afternoon classes ended, as the atmosphere began to lighten, Hiratsuka-sensei
came  towards  the  classroom  as  if  she  had  been  hurrying  somewhat.  She  peered  in
through the door and when our eyes met, she smiled tiredly.

“Hikigaya. Do you have a moment after this? You’re being called in.”

As if Hiratsuka-sensei had said a joke, the lot remaining in the classroom slightly turned
their heads.

Already  having  packed  up  and  gathered  my  things,  I  took  my  bag  and  headed  off.
Hiratsuka-sensei smiled bitterly at that.

“The reason you’re being called… Looks like you already know why.”

“Sort of, since I can think of a lot of reasons. I used to be called in every time something
happened.”

“Seriously.”

Hiratsuka-sensei shrugged her shoulders and her bitter smile appeared somewhat sad. I
also pretended to smile bitterly while averting my eyes.

And, what came within my line of sight were those groups doubting us.

On one side were several students giving us strange looks while there were those at the
back of the classroom giving us their usual reactions.

Miura didn’t seem to have any interest in us at all and looked bored while twirling her
hair with her fingertips. Ebina-san was looking at me while nodding. Tobe’s group was
smirking while whispering, “tsubeh. Hikitani-kun screwed up, beh”. Damn you, Tobe...

But there was just one in the middle, Hayama, that maintained a cold smile like a statue
and fixated his gaze this way.

I have no reason to know what he means by that and I’m not interested either, but I can
tell just from looking that there’s pity.

And  finally,  there  was  Yuigahama.  Quickly  able  to  guess  the  situation  based  off
Hiratsuka-sensei’s presence here, she stopped packing her things and only grabbed her
nearby coat with her as she ran out.

Exiting into the corridor, Yuigahama caught up to us. She probably intended to come to
help me, but I can’t keep relying on Yuigahama for this. Always, up until now, I came this
far by relying on her. I wanted to complete the finishing touches by myself.

“It’s just me appointed to be there, right?”

“That’s right. Well, I don’t know if it’s an appointment or not. I’ve just been told to call in
the person responsible.”

“Yeah, that would be me.”

Hiratsuka-sensei  breathed  out  with  an  expression  mixed  between  bitterness  and
sarcastic amazement. Yuigahama watched our exchange with a long face before uneasily
opening her mouth to speak.

“But I think it’d be good if I went as well…”

“It’s okay, I’ll do it properly.”

I said it so nonchalantly that Yuigahama opened her mouth to say something, but just
before  she  could,  her  words  had  caught  in  her  throat.  And  then,  with  lips  pursed,  she
made a slight nod.

Her  strange  behaviour  caught  my  attention  and  when  I  turned  my  gaze  to  face  her,
Hiratsuka-sensei struck my shoulder.

“There’s no need to worry, I’m here too. Nothing weird is going to happen.”

Hiratsuka-sensei  said  to  put  her  at  ease  and  Yuigahama  nodded  by  returning  a  faint
smile.

“Then I’ll be off for a bit.”

“Yeah. If something happens, call me.”

As  she  spoke,  Yuigahama  lightly  made  a  soldier’s  gesture  with  a  raised  hand  while
Hiratsuka-sensei  and  I  began  to  walk  again.  I  burningly  watched  her  figure  clad  in  a
white coat with hands deep in her pockets as I followed her one step behind.

“Is this according to your plan?”

Hiratsuka-sensei  slightly  moved  her  neck  and  asked  my  reflection  on  the  glass  of  the
windows extending across the corridor.

“...Sort of, for the most part.”

Honestly  speaking,  not  everything  has  been  going  according  to  plan,  but  the  very
minimum has been achieved. To me, this is a job well done. As I answered, I could tell
Hiratsuka-sensei was smiling wryly over her back.

“That’s very much like your methods. Do you have a chance of winning?”

“There doesn’t have to be. In any case, there isn’t another way.”

As  the  continuing  glass  of  the  windows  changed  to  walls,  I  could  no  longer  infer
Hiratsuka-sensei’s expression. I could only hear a sighing voice escaping.

“...That’s not a bad answer. I like it, that kind of thing.”
As  she  spoke,  Hiratsuka-sensei’s  figure  unexpectedly  disappeared.  I  knew  she’d  just
turned the corner and was going down the stairs, but even so, I’d hurriedly moved my
legs faster. Becoming aware of what I was doing, I smiled bitterly.

Someday  soon,  will  I  end  up  looking  for  that  figure  every  time  something  happens?
Because I was imagining stuff like that, I had stopped walking at some point. As I slowly
went down the stairs one step at a time, the distance between us began to widen. Just
like this, I will surely have to come to terms with separating from this person.

Neither of us spoke and the only sounds came from our footsteps.

As we approached the landing, Hiratsuka-sensei’s white coat flowed as she turned half
her body towards me.

“Hikigaya,  do  you  have  time  sometime  soon?  It  doesn’t  have  to  be  today.  It  can  be
tomorrow or some other day.”

Hearing that, I thought about my schedule for a moment. Today I still had to clean up
things  here  and  there  which  would  take  up  some  time,  but  I  really  had  nothing  to  do
tomorrow and after.

There  probably  wouldn’t  be  any  club  activities  anymore.  Regardless  of  how  the  prom
turns out, there likely wouldn’t be.

I  was  late  in  replying  because  I  was  suddenly  thinking  about  all  of  this.  Our  footsteps
resounded as if filling in the meanwhile silence.

“...Well, I’m pretty much free.”

“Really. Okay then…”

Walking forward, Hiratsuka-sensei was also slowly thinking about something as she cut
off for a moment.

“...Okay then, let’s go for ramen!”

With only her neck turned this way, and her long hair shaking, I could see her smiling as
if she won something.

I replied with a bitter smile and a nod.
                                  8-2

At last, we reached the reception office and Hiratsuka-sensei knocked on the door. The
voice of the person who requested me coolly sounded out and I remember having heard
that voice somewhere before. It seemed the visitor was Yukinoshita’s mother after all.

I followed Hiratsuka-sensei into the room and there someone gracefully standing next to
the window turned around to face us. The person before us, wearing a wisteria-coloured
kimono moderately decorated with peach blossoms, was truly an unimaginable beauty.

Coffee had already been prepared and placed at the seat of honour. Yukinoshita’s mother
sat there and with a friendly voice asked me to sit down as well. I quietly obeyed and
Hiratsuka-sensei took a seat next to me.

“We’ve met the other day as well, haven’t we.”

“Yes... Nice meeting you then.”

I  answered  with  a  twitching  smile.  Her  formal  smile  overlapped  with  Haruno-san’s
features  and  frankly  I  wasn’t  very  good  at  dealing  with  it.  As  if  she  could  tell  I  was
nervous from my state, Yukinoshita’s mother raised a hand to her mouth; smiling as if
she was lovingly looking at a small animal.

“Then let’s start over… May I ask about your reason for being here today?”

When  Hiratsuka-sensei  cut  in,  Yukinoshita’s  mother  gently  smiled  and  took  out  her
smartphone.

“Ah, that’s right. Then getting straight into it… This, were you the one who thought of it?”

On the low table was the phone screen that was displaying the official site of the dummy
prom.

Absorbed in the thought that this was the finale of the match, I laughed a little. Because
I’d  wanted  this  shameless  attitude  calling  for  diplomacy  during  this  critical  moment.
While this sense of crisis is being called an accidental trigger, there had been no other
option but to call for a compromise.

“It could be the opinion of some students. These days there are quite some flashy high
school students.”

As  I  said  a  line  I’d  been  told  somewhere  before,  reworded  with  sarcasm  mixed  in,
Hiratsuka-sensei’s elbow hit my side. Yukinoshita’s mother looked at that with a smile
and responded with a certain tone of voice.
“I see…”

Yukinoshita’s  mother  placed  her  hands  on  her  temples  and  narrowed  her  eyes.  Her
gestures reminded me of the gaze of big cats as they went into hunting mode.

I started to get a bad feeling as sweat gradually began to run down my scalp. I don’t mean
to brag, but I’ve never been wrong about bad feelings.

Suddenly, Yukinoshita’s mother began to speak.

“Running another proposal isn’t a bad move, but the flaws stand out a bit. Also, even if
you  increase  the  number  of  choices,  it  will  still  be  difficult  without  resolving  the
fundamental problems. What’s your opinion on that part?

That gaze and tone of voice had changed to become so much colder than before. A cold
chill ran down my spine. The last part of what she said seemed a question aimed towards
me, but my head couldn’t get around to an answer.

Yukinoshita’s mother rejected the dummy prom proposal we’d made because it was just
something  used  to  run  against  the  original  proposal.  Had  she  heard  something  from
Haruno-san in advance? No, judging from her actions the other day, she wouldn’t go out
of her way to tell her mother when it seemed there would be discord.

In  other  words,  it  simply  means  she  saw  through  our  plans.  In  addition,  because  she
could point it out from the beginning, our plans were crushed before they even started.

I should have replied, but I had lost my words and I was left dumbfoundedly looking at
Yukinoshita’s mother.

The  person  on  the  other  side  was  calm  and  composed  as  she  hid  her  mouth  with  a
folding fan, smiling as if she was enjoying this. That figure appeared as if she was looking
forward to what hand I would play next.

Though she could make a face like that, I could only put up a bitter smile. The things I
had thought of saying had all blown away. As long as her first hand remained calling out
my  plan  as  something  just  used  to  run  against  the  original,  there  was  no  meaning  in
exchanging  words  about  it.  Besides,  the  dummy  prom  plan  had  been  seen  through  by
both Hayama and Haruno-san the very first time they saw it as well. I had already lost
the moment I thought it would go through someone like Yukinoshita’s mother.

“The real problem, the one about the self-restraint at a prom; the fact we can expect a
subset of students to rebel against it is true. The risk of this happening in a place not in
our awareness still exists.”

Seeing me unable to reply, Hiratsuka-sensei promptly intervened.
“Therefore,  it  might  be  wise  to  choose  situations  that  falls  within  our  management  to
some extent. The Student Council’s side have revised their plans to find a way that will
satisfy both sides.”

Hiratsuka-sensei  handed  documents  that  she’d  set  on  the  side  table  to  Yukinoshita’s
mother and gave me a part of them too. Flicking through them, I could see the revisions
from what Yukinoshita and the others had said the other day. Yukinoshita’s mother also
examined  through  the  documents  but  had  a  dull  reaction  to  it  with  a  somewhat  sour
expression.

Hiratsuka-sensei’s  follow  up  itself  was  in  line  with  my  ideas.  But,  seeing  the  dummy
prom completely as just an alternative plan made our persuasive attempts feel strongly
like we were on the defence. Yukinoshita’s mother also had a troubled look as she turned
her neck.

“I  see…  It  looks  as  if  you’re  bringing  together  components  to  make  persuasions,  but  I
wonder  if  they  would  understand…  Because  there  could  be  people  on  the  inside  also
stubborn about this.”

Yukinoshita’s  mother  mixed  her  words  with  a  bitter  smile.  Though  her  wording  was
different, it was something I’d heard somewhere before.

“Even if we continue talking like this, to change everyone’s opinions, they’d need to be
here.”

Not  paying  attention  as  the  other  side  continued  to  talk,  I  lightly  closed  my  eyes  and
searched  through  my  memories.  If  I  remember  correctly,  it  was  Yukinoshita  Haruno
who’d said it; that she didn’t care about how the prom itself turned out.

In that case, for what reason did Yukinoshita’s mother bring up that subject here.

The answer was simple. Because it had resulted in a problem.

Yukinoshita’s mother had a way of solving it and the one tool required existed here. It
would do nothing but erase the dispute; her idealism and actions didn’t matter. She had a
habit  of  seeing  things  as  problems  and  avoiding  uproars.  Thus,  she  was  just  playing
along.

But  that’s  why  we  proposed  the  dummy  prom;  to  lead  her  to  something  more
reasonable. That aim itself was definitely not wrong.

It’s just, where we’d drawn the line was wrong. Methods are methods, tools are tools,
and to that end, there was no concept of friend or foe.

This time, Yukinoshita’s mother was the messenger. She was only a negotiator sent by
the other party.

My opponent in this game isn’t Yukinoshita’s mother. She was just another piece on the
board; the strongest queen.

In that case, there was still a hand I could play.

There was probably just one person in this world, something only I could use, even if I
wouldn’t be forgiven for using it just once; the absolute lowest and worst means.

However, if I only had one card left in my hand, then I had no choice but to play it.

“To persuade that ‘everyone’ you speak of, can we ask for your cooperation?”

Maybe my statement was unexpected, Yukinoshita’s mother tilted her head. A movement
so innocent, I dropped a smile. Their reactions when they’re told something out of their
expectations were truly so similar.

“There  is  a  way  of  persuading  them,  isn’t  there?  Then  wouldn’t  the  end  result  change
depending on who says it?”

What’s important isn’t “what is said”, but “who says it” may be an overused phrase, but it
is  the  truth.  The  subset  of  stubborn  caregivers  and  such  could  be  convinced  if  it  was
Yukinoshita’s mother saying it instead of me. They would also know they’d be dealing
with an opponent who held a higher rank than themselves and it’s because of this I was
asking for her assistance.

The nature of this game was nothing other than to take the opponent’s queen.

“...In fact, it wouldn’t be very persuasive if it was someone like me who isn’t really known
by anybody talking.”

With a dry laugh and a pitiful voice, I had played check on the unknown black king.

“That’s  not  true.  I  think  you’ve  done  well  in  such  a  short  time.  It  was  to  the  extent  I
became curious who it was.”

After Yukinoshita’s mother smiled and spoke as if she was truly impressed, she turned
her neck.

“My apologies, had I asked you what your name is?”

And then she lowered her eyebrows and asked like she wasn’t that sorry.

In a moment, Hiratsuka-sensei held my wrist to restrain me. She understood well that if I
said my name here, the other side would get some kind of meaning out of it.
But my turn had been over the moment the other side had asked. All that was left was to
fulfil my role as another piece on the board.

This piece usually never had any use. They were good-for-nothings that had no place on
the board except to take up space.

But, in just one circumstance were they capable of removing the queen from play.

“It’s Hikigaya Hachiman.”

When I named myself, Hiratsuka-sensei breathed out a small sigh as if she had given up
and let go of my wrist.

“Hikigaya…”

Yukinoshita’s mother placed a hand to her mouth while repeating my name in a small
voice  and  wandered  her  gaze  downwards.  Seeming  like  she  finally  remembered
something, she raised her head.

“I see… You’re…”

I returned her gaze with a formal smile. I can’t do it as well as Hayama or Haruno-san,
but I tried as best I could. Maybe it was effective, because Hiratsuka-sensei looked like
she was playing dumb.

The problem starts here. As I’ve named myself, I couldn’t afford to make any mistakes in
my  statements  or  behaviour.  Whether  it  be  coercion,  insolence,  or  even  being  overly
sucking-up, any of it could be seen as intimidation.

And so, as long as I’ve been cornered, mistakes from now on will become my fault and
becomes something the other side could take advantage of. That’s why I have to act with
sincerity and convey that we have no ill intentions.

“We caused you terrible trouble on that occasion. You parents were left with many things
to do and excuse us that we couldn’t greet them.”

Her words were as flat as possible and her lowered head was neither too shallow nor
deep. Just fulfilling with as much duty as she held responsible. There weren’t any other
unnecessary emotions within.

This was a one form of diplomatic etiquette. It wasn’t an excessive show, but just enough.

Maybe she thought the message was correctly conveyed, she returned to her composed
self.

“We truly apologise for the trouble caused by one of our own. How was your leg injury?
We offer our sincere apologies for the inconvenience it must have caused.”

I positively act in response to Yukinoshita’s mother deeply lowering her head.

“I made a full recovery thanks to you. To the point my leg became even sturdier than
before. You can watch me dance when the prom is on.”

At  that  moment  I  moved  just  my  foot  around  as  my  shoes  made  tapping  noises  and
showed off how random my step work was. As I did so, Yukinoshita’s mother observed,
placing her hand to her mouth as she pleasantly laughed.

“What bad manners.”

Hiratsuka-sensei  hit  my  waist  with  a  smack  and  thanks  to  that  I  could  finally  stop
clowning around. I scowled at myself for acting so foolishly and I refrained from letting
out a deep sigh.

Still smiling as Yukinoshita’s mother watched, her eyes narrowed and she murmured to
herself.

“...has quite the nerve.”

Her gaze was so cold it made me feel as if she was evaluating me and I was being frozen
solid. In those eyes that looked as if they could see through everything, I felt nauseous.

But that gaze soon loosened. Yukinoshita’s mother opened her folding fan and hid her
mouth as she giggled. That was this person’s way of laughing honestly.

“I’ll do it.”

“Thank you for your help.”

Until the very end, I tried to maintain my composure as I answered; wiping the sweat
from  my  forehead  while  pretending  I  was  combing  my  fringe.  My  shirt  was  tightly
sticking to me from cold sweat and my throat was so dry it hurt even just by breathing in.

Looking in hindsight, all I’d done was name myself and talk about that incident in the
past.  That  name,  that  conversation,  those  themselves  had  no  meaning.  That’s  why
whoever heard it can give whatever meaning they want to it.

Yukinoshita’s  mother  had  been  smiling  for  some  time  now,  but  it  disappeared  as  she
flicked the fan closed.

“Alright… let me try talking to the caregivers. It would help if the teacher could also be
present.”
“We will adjust to your schedule.”

I listened as the adults discussed business. My nervousness from before had been cleanly
cut and I began to feel a surge of tiredness. Without realising it I was staring up at the
ceiling, sighing deeply, and standing in a daze.

“Hikigaya. Can you do something for me?”

“Y-Yes.”

Suddenly being talked to, I straightened my back in panic. It looked like the conversation
had progressed quite a lot while I hadn’t been listening.

“I  can’t  leave  after  this.  Can  you  tell  Yukinoshita  to  continue  the  revised  plan  for  the
prom? How you tell her, I’ll leave it to you.”

“Ha… I got it...”

Hiratsuka-sensei just nodded as I answered without having understood the flow of the
conversation. Her eyes were telling me to hurry up and go. Well, it was true we didn’t
have much time left until the prom. The decision-makers should be promptly told of this.

After I stood up, Yukinoshita’s mother sitting on the other end smiled.

“Hikigaya-kun. Let us meet again.”

“Hahaha… Please excuse me.”

Playing it off with a dry laugh and without giving a direct answer, I bowed and left the
reception room. If possible, I didn’t want to meet her again...


                                  8-3

I quietly walked down the school building in the approaching twilight and finally reached
the Student Council room.

I stood in front of the door and knocked. There was only a slight delay before there was
an answer, and I breathed out a deep sigh.

There were no sounds of footsteps and the door opened quietly. The heater must have
been turned on as a flow of warm air escaped from the narrow opening.

The  person  holding  the  door  knob  was  a  girl  with  plaited  hair  and  glasses.  If  I
remembered correctly, this was the secretary. She seemed to know who I was as she let
me inside.

I lightly lowering my head in thanks and entered, and right in front of me was the vice-
president at his desk, crying “there’s no time… there’s no time...” while doing his work.
Good, good, suffer some more.

I looked around the inside of the room, but Yukinoshita wasn’t here. Just Isshiki at the
desk on the far end, gnawing on snacks and tilting her neck as she looked at me.

“...I hadn’t called for you.”

Am  I  not  allowed  to  come  if  I’m  not  called  for?  Yep,  not  allowed.  When  I  opened  my
mouth to say the reason I’d come, Isshiki clapped her hands.

“Ah, are you here to help? Aiming to be a servant? A free labour worker?”

What’s  with  that  super  development?  Just  how  much  are  you  leaping?  Having  to  deal
with Irohasu who hadn’t changed, my shoulders dropped as some strength left my body.

“Expect  that  next  year.  I’ll  introduce  you  to  a  promising  rookie.  Anyway,  where’s
Yukinoshita?”

I asked after our exchange of our usual remarks. Isshiki turned her neck and glanced at
the unornamented desk Yukinoshita used.

“Haa, now that you mention it, she’s not here.”

Isshiki seemed to only notice this now. Seeing that reaction, it probably hadn’t been that
long since she’d left.

She probably left because the heater was on too strongly. Anyway, if Yukinoshita wasn’t
here then there was no reason for me to be here either.

“Then nevermind. Later.”

“Ah, hey, what’s with that?! Didn’t you come for some reason?!”

Isshiki called out and stopped me as I tried to quickly leave the room. I suddenly realised
when  she  said  “reason”.  I  hadn’t  been  told  specifically  to  tell  Isshiki,  but  I  figured  she
should know. I stopped walking and turned around.

“Ah,  that’s  right.  They’ve  decided  to  go  with  your  proposal  for  the  prom.  You  can  go
ahead and start on it. Good luck.”

“Haa… Huh?”

Isshiki’s mouth dropped open and turned her entire upper body along with her neck. If
she heard the details, I’d have to tell her the whole story of how it all happened which
would  be  too  much  of  a  pain.  I’ll  take  my  leave  while  Isshiki’s  head  is  still  trying  to
comprehend it.


                                  8-4

I hadn’t decided on where I was going, but even so my legs didn’t hesitate and naturally
headed towards that place. I thought she must be there.

In  the  empty  hallway  of  the  special  building.  It’s  been  almost  a  year  that  I’ve  passed
through here towards the clubroom. I would probably still reach it even if I closed my
eyes.

Finally, I could see the door. I stood in front of it, traced it, then placed my fingers on the
handle. It should be made of the same materials as every other classroom door, but I felt
as if I would never forget this coldness and hardness.

If I pulled with some strength, the door would make a noise and slide open.

What’s in front of me, wasn’t a deviant, but a regular classroom.

However, the reason I felt this classroom was different was likely because a certain girl
was there.

In  the  setting  sun  and  the  blowing  wind,  Yukinoshita  Yukino  was  standing  by  the
window, gazing at the outside.

The window was wide open as if to change the atmosphere in the clubroom not used by
anyone in a while and the curtain was swaying in the wind.

Even if the world ended, this girl would be here, like this. This sight was so much like a
painting that I was making these illusions.

When I saw that, both my body and mind had stopped.

——I was lost in admiration even when I was defeated.

Yukinoshita noticed the visitor and she held her hair swaying in the wind as she turned
around. Her eyes widened as if surprised for a moment, but quickly expressed a smile.

“Hello.”

“...Yeah.”

As I answered her, Yukinoshita closed the window. The swaying curtains also stopped
and all sound disappeared inside the clubroom.

The  sunset  brilliantly  filled  this  tranquil  space.  While  my  eyes  narrowed  due  to  the
brightness,  Yukinoshita  leaned  on  the  glass  window  and  the  glossy  black  hair  on  her
shoulder shone even further.

“Do you have a reason to be here?”

“No, I was told to contact you about work.”

“I see, I’m sorry I made you go out of your way to come all the way here.”

“You don’t have to worry about it, it doesn’t take much time and effort.”

As I answered, I pulled the chair closest to the door. In this place where I always sat on it,
I lightly gestured to Yukinoshita to also sit down. It looked as if Yukinoshita was taken
aback, but as I waited for her, she sighed as if giving up and sat on the chair closest to the
window.

“About the prom, ultimately your revised plan has safely passed. It looks like the subset
of caregivers against the idea will be persuaded and will have to come to terms with it.”

It should have been the first time Yukinoshita had heard of this, but she didn’t look so
surprised. She didn’t move a single eyebrow and was just silently listening. While I was
thought it was strange, I continued to say the last part.

“That’s why… It’s my loss.”

“Yes… It’s your win.”

Finally, Yukinoshita deeply sighed and muttered.

“...Why?”

“It ended up this way because of your methods again. By essence, it’s your win.”

Remembering the connection between the feeling of self-scorn and laughing at myself, I
spat out the doubt that had been living in my chest.

“...Even so, you foresaw this. Didn’t you know of my methods by now? That makes you
the winner after all.”

Hayama Hayato and Yukinoshita Haruno both knew of the dummy prom plan and had
immediately  seen  through  it.  I’d  barely  managed  to  play  check  on  the  king  by  getting
Yukinoshita’s  mother  on  our  side.  Then  in  that  case,  it  wouldn’t  be  any  mystery  that
Yukinoshita  Yukino,  who  held  the  same  specs,  would  have  seen  through  Hikigaya
Hachiman’s shallow thinking.

In the first place, the way Yukinoshita and Isshiki presented their idea had already been
prone to errors. But that itself became the clue to my idea of presenting two choices, in
which one choice would be crushed and the other would progress.

As I questioned her, Yukinoshita hid her eyes and her neck shook.

“That’s not certain. As long as the faction opposing the prom itself existed, our reasoning
couldn’t  even  become  established…  But  I  figured,  if  it  was  you,  you’d  be  able  to  do
something about it.

It was just like Yukinoshita to have foreseen such. Just, the smile she added at the end
was connected to what she’d said. I wanted to deny it, but I could only foolishly lift one
side of my cheek.

“Trust is a heavy thing… It surprises me.”

“I was also surprised. I naturally just thought in that way.”

Yukinoshita  smiled  bitterly  like  she  was  being  shy.  I  felt  breathless  seeing  that.  As  I
wondered how to reply back, Yukinoshita murmured in a fragile voice.

“I depended on you so much that I thought like that…”

Those eyes gazing at me were blurry with regret and sorrow. I couldn’t bear being seen
with those eyes that I averted my own and quickly spoke.

“...Even if that’s the case, it doesn’t change the fact it’s your win. The condition for victory
was to make the prom a reality using our own methods, was it not. What made it happen
was your plan, your methods.”

“...You’re okay with it as my win?”

Her tone of voice as she asked was feeble, and I wanted to cut her off from talking that
way that I nodded three times while looking away.

“Then… The match is hereby over. Will you listen to what I have to say?”

I couldn’t pretend to not hear what she’d said. As I looked at Yukinoshita, it seemed as if
she’d abandoned her weakness as she clenched her fists and tightened her lips. One of
her eyes was shaking with determination as she waited for my impending reply.

“...No, it won’t be that way. It’s true it’s your win this time. But that doesn’t mean you’ve
won the entire competition.”

“In  regards  to  the  conditions  for  victory,  winning  this  match  means  winning  the
competition, and the other person must listen to what the winner says… I’m sure I said
that.”
I became aware of my lips drying up as I watched her explain it indifferently and declare
it.  I  remembered  hearing  those  words  in  the  depths  of  my  memories.  While  in  both
impatience and desperation, I somehow opened my mouth.

“...That was just a figure of speech, a difference in opinion.”

As Yukinoshita let out a trembling sigh, she murmured with a sweet tone of voice as if
she was whispering sweet nothings.

“Then… You decide.”

As I see that fleeting transparent smile, I come to terms with my own defeat. She knows I
wouldn’t be able to answer if she said that.

While  securing  Yukinoshita  Yukino’s  autonomy,  as  long  as  I’ve  decided  to  respect  her
own  decisions,  I  can’t  allow  her  to  entrust  her  decisions  to  anyone  else.  Even  if  that
someone was myself.

That’s exactly why she accepted this match. For this one moment, all the disagreements,
all the disorders, all the misunderstandings; she had brushed it all aside. To properly end
this match, and this relationship.

“I  can’t  make  the  decision…  This  is  the  same  as  me  deciding  the  winner  arbitrarily.
Yuigahama is also in this match. And it’s judged at Hiratsuka-sensei’s own discretion and
bias. And, and it’s sort of…”

I couldn’t accept that ending. I quickly spoke as I couldn’t allow things to end like this. I
didn’t  know  how  to  make  her  wait  for  just  a  moment,  nor  how  I  could  stop  her.
Forgetting how to even breathe, I was reaching out toward nothingness.

“...I’ll be honest.”

As she interrupted my voice, Yukinoshita smiled sadly and faced me with wet eyes.

“It was fun. It was my first time. I was happy thinking the time we spent together was
comfortable…”

Being told she was truly happy with a face that looked as if she would cry, I could no
longer deny it nor stop her.” As I lost strength in arms and lowered them, Yukinoshita
nodded as if she was thanking me and continued to speak.

“I’d never argued and fought like we did… nor cried in front of others. I was so nervous
even when we went out together, and it was the first time I was so unsure of what to do…
I  didn’t  even  know  it  was  okay  to  rely  on  someone.  That’s  why  it  went  wrong
somewhere…”
I looked up at the ceiling as I listened to her speaking so quickly about unsolicited things
in a trembling voice. The distant sunset hurt my eyes, but even so I couldn’t close them
and just let out a damp sigh.

“This  kind  of  imitation-like  relationship  is  wrong.  It’s  definitely  different  to  what  you
desired.”

Her monologue tied things together like that, and when I realised the end was coming, I
finally looked at her face.

“I’m okay. I’m… okay now. I was saved by you.”

Wiping her glistening tears with her fingertips, Yukinoshita Yukino smiled beautifully.

“That’s why, this match, and this relationship, let’s end it with this.”

If that was her answer, I had no reason to make an objection. The objective to help her
was  achieved,  the  co-dependency  was  resolved  to  end  the  relationship,  and  the  boy’s
willpower stood firm.

I didn’t happen to have the mind of fulfilling wishes. The club activities and work ended
here.

That’s why I had nothing left. Every reason I had to get involved with her were all gone.

“Alright… It’s my loss.”

I  sighed  deeply  as  I  spoke  as  if  I  was  spitting  everything  out.  To  fulfil  the  last
responsibility left to me, I questioned her.

“I’ll listen to what you say. What should I do? ...If it’s something I can do, I’ll grant you
whatever you want.”

In truth, I’d vowed to at least grant that much, no matter what.

Yukinoshita  let  out  a  sigh  as  if  in  relief,  she  told  me  something  she  must  have  been
holding close to her dearly.

“Please grant Yuigahama-san’s wish.”

“Are you fine with that as your request?”

“Yes, this is my request.”

To Yukinoshita who closed her eyes and nodded as if caring for someone, I answered her
with the most gentlest smile I could make.
“...Alright.”

Following our last exchange, I stood up from my chair. Yukinoshita didn’t move from that
place and the distance between us began to widen just by the sounds of my footsteps as I
finally reached the corridor.

And then, softly and gently, I closed the door as if stopping myself from doing so.