Hogfather - Cats

Binky touched down lightly on Death's lawn. Susan didn't bother with the front door but went round the back, which was never locked.

There had been changes. One significant change, at least. There was a cat-flap in the door. She stared at it. After a second or two a ginger cat came through the flap, gave her an I'm-not-hungryand-you're-notinteresting look, and padded off into the gardens. Susan pushed open the door into the kitchen. Cats of every size and colour covered every surface. Hundreds of eyes swivelled to watch her.

It was Mrs Gammage all over again, she thought. The old woman was a regular in Biers for the company and was quite gaga, and one of the symptoms of those going completely yoyo was that they broke out in chronic cats. Usually cats who'd mastered every detail of feline existence except the whereabouts of the dirt box.

Several of them had their noses in a bowl of cream. Susan had never been able to see the attraction in cats. They were owned by the kind of people who liked puddings. There were actual people in the world whose idea of heaven would be a chocolate cat.

'Push off, the lot of you,' she said. 'I've never known him have pets.'

The cats gave her a look to indicate that they were intending to go somewhere else in any case and strolled off, licking their chops. The bowl slowly filled up again.

They were obviously living cats. Only life had colour here. Everything else was created by Death. Colour, along with plumbing and music, were arts that escaped the grasp of his genius.

***

Hogfather - p98