The Bible: Part III & the Value of Caffeinated Beverages

The Bible: Part III & the Value of Caffeinated Beverages

I've been contacted by our lord and savior Jesus Christ via what can only be called Angels. They have instructed me to write the Bible: Part III.

I have it on high authority that one of the sections will focus specifically on coffee beans, imagine it; an entire chapter dedicated to the proper use of coffee! A new Sabbath will be created just for coffee, a new day of the week as well, it will be called Coffeeday, and it will happen between Friday & Saturday. So it goes Friday, Coffeeday, Saturday....got it? This is very important work and I am greatly honored to be chosen to speak for our Lord and share this with the world. Who would have thought God would choose me right? Not me, thats for sure, so I said as much and one of the Angels said it was cool, they liked my style and where could they get some energy drinks.

After we got the energy drinks they told me that there will be some new commandments! Holy moley! So I hope you like rules, because we've got some new bangers that will blow your socks off! Here is a sneak peak: 1) Every house must have its own camel and must not covet the camel of thy neighbor. Thats the only new commandment I can leak for now, but more are coming, don't you worry!

Just before the angels left they told me that the devil was getting another reboot. Just keep it in mind for the future.

So start spreading this information, we don't want anyone burning in Hell due to improper coffee use. I will contact you when I have more information from our lord god.