DiscoDude: ---BEGIN SESSION---
DiscoDude: Session logging commenced
Ryusui: The famed Professor Screwball, inventor of such magnificent, miraculous things as the magnetic television set, clip-on underwear, the thermonuclear airfryer, and the flame-retardant web browser has opened his laboratory to the public for one day!
Ryusui: The four of you - Brina, Bucky, Cecil, and Rira - are lucky visitors to the workshop where the questionably sane doctor works his magic! And by magic, I mean SCIENCE!
Rira: "... Why did I come here... I thought that the science fair thing was for kids, I am an adult, I can just watch cartoons all day..." Rira grumbles, arriving with the group at the entrance.
Ryusui: "Ha ha! Now just stand right there, Mitch!" the labcoat-wearing platypus with his thick goggles and rubber gloves says to a duck in a striped shirt wearing a large, elaborate contraption on his head, standing right under a gigantic comical ray gun-like zapper. "If this works like I know it will, you're about to make history!"
Ryusui: "My name's not Mitch-" the duck protests, right as the Professor pulls a lever; technicolor sparks of pure SCIENCE erupt from the zapper, and "Mitch" vanishes in a puff of smoke! The Professor claps, elated: "It works, it works! I mean, I knew it would, but it works!"
Rira: Rira looks at the empty spot, looks at the ray gun, looks at the platypus... And starts eyeing the door...
Ryusui: Other than that, you're surrounded by messy workbenches and shelves filled with all the Professor's latest half-bakedfinished projects! Tanks full of things in green goo, disassembled robot parts, a spherical contraption with several Post-It Notes stuck to it to the tune of "DO NOT TOUCH! WILL END WORLD!"...
Bucky: Bucky waddles in after the rest. “Mm, I appeaw to have been sepawated fwom dah cwass! Teachuh?” He notices the others just now. “Oh, hewwo dere! Who ah you?”
Ryusui: "Oh, hello there, Mitch!" the Professor says, beaming at you, Bucky. "Would you like to help me make SCIENCE?"
Rira: Rira opens her mouth to intercede and interrupt this exchange
Bucky: “Nope! Have you seen the cwass twip? I seem to have wost it.”
Rira: Rira... Then slowly closes down her mouth again, before hearing this
Rira: "Maybe you should go for it."
Brina: Brina makes sure to look around, wanting to take in all her surroundings and looking for all the mad science tropes
Ryusui: <@!Brina>: There is a set of Newton's Balls marked "Perpetual Motion Device." It, too, has a "Do Not Touch!" post-it note attached. There's also a stylish wide-brimmed hat floating several inches above a dummy head on a desk - "Antigravity Chapeau." This one's post-it says "next year's big fashion trend?" Likewise, there's a pair of mannequin legs on yet another desk; there's no sign of anything unusual about them other than the post-it that says "Invisible Shoes (pentagon must be interested in these babies!)"
Ryusui: <@!Bucky>: The Professor pays you no heed, instead turning around and working furiously on something on his desk. "Just a second, Mitch...I seem to have misplaced my Einstein-Rosen Bridge Colllimator, but if you can give me a minute I can make another one, no sweat!"
Brina: Brina giggles and gives a thumbs up, "I'm sure everything here is exceedingly dangerous as expected, isn't it?"
Bucky: “I dunno; mama says nevuh do weird science with stwanguhs!” He waddles over to <@!Cecil (and Laz)>. “Hewwo dere! Awe you duh chapewones?”
Rira: "Yes... I guess you shouldn't touch any of it."
Cecil (and Laz): "...Hell no." Cecil responded to Bucky. "I'm just here to try some new food or whatever." They reply after they responded.
Rira: "What was in the invites anyways? Magic? Somehow I decided to come over this mess over a good-fashioned cartoon maraton. Maybe the spirals all over the invite had something to do with it..."
Rira then scratches her chin
Cecil (and Laz): Cecil looks over at Rira before shrugging, "Don't know don't care, where is the food at?"
Brina: Brina pfffts, "You can do what you want, I know I personally won't be eating anything that comes from here"
Rira: Rira looks over to Cecil "You... Can try the 'don't touch' boxes..."
Rira: "Also, the mad scientist is working on something. Are we going to be concerned, or are we good?"
Ryusui: <@!Rira> There is a stack of paper on a table labeled "Mind-Control Letterhead." Or does it? Just looking at it makes your head swim and forces you to look away. That's some effective stuff!
Ryusui: <@!Cecil (and Laz)> There's no food present. There is, however, what looks to be a bright green Twinkie on a plate.
Cecil (and Laz): Cecil and Laz approach the Twinkie. "...What kind of Lucky Charm'd themed...is this?"
Rira: "Hey... If you eat that, and survive, can you leave half of it for me? Thanks."
Ryusui: "You're more than welcome to take a taste, Mitch!" the Professor says, smiling at you, <@!Cecil (and Laz)>.
Cecil (and Laz): Cecil looks at it, "Laz take the first bite." Cecil says, handing it to Laz for the first taste test. He sighs, "Fine," before taking a bite of half of the twinkie.
Brina: Brina sways her tail and watches, giggling and watching while making sure to be cautious herself
Ryusui: He takes a bite. It tastes like you'd expect: a Twinkie with a hint of lime, maybe some mint, cabbage, a general green flavor to it.
Ryusui: He's about to take another when his entire color palette inverts, making him look like a photographic negative.
Rira: "... This is not lethal, can I have a bite too?"
Ryusui: "Interesting! Very interesting! So that's what happens when you eat food from a world with different universal constants!
Ryusui: <@!Cecil (and Laz)>, do you let Rira?
Bucky: “Ooh!” Bucky gets out a clipboard and pen. “Dat’s anothuh check-mawk on duh wowksheet!”
Bucky: “I’w be done with dis in no time at dis wate!”
Ryusui: ( <@!Cecil (and Laz)>? )
Ryusui: (also take a laugh, Bucky)
Cecil (and Laz): (sorry)
Cecil (and Laz): Laz looks at Cecil, "This is like...everything in one but in a good way." Cecil tilts her head and eats the other half.
Ryusui: <@!Cecil (and Laz)>, you turn upside-down.
Ryusui: That is, you feel physically like you're rightside-up, but everything around you looks upside-down. Also you look upside-down to everyone else.
Ryusui: The Professor is positively giddy as he scribbles his notes down.
Rira: "... You didn't even aknowlodge me. My day is ruined. Again."
Ryusui: (Also Cecil take a laugh too)
Ryusui: (and Rira gets one too XD)
Rira: Interesting
Rira: Anyone who has less laughs than me can take this laugh
Rira: first come, first served
Cecil (and Laz): "...This is NOT HOW YOU SAID IT WOULD BE!!" Cecil yells out and covers her eyes, "This is horrible, I can't even see straight."
Ryusui: ( <@!Brina>, do you want the laugh I just gave Rira?)
Ryusui: "This is wonderful!" the Professor says, clapping. "The effects are purely non-deterministic!"
Brina: ( I wanna try to be funny enough to earn my own :p )
Brina: Brina blinks, "Did you invite us here just because you needed some guinea pigs?"
Rira: It seems Rira keeps one laugh for now!
Ryusui: "Guinea pigs? Oh, no, guinea pigs are too little to be of any use for real SCIENCE!" the Professor chuckles. He rifles through a drawer and pulls out a candy bar: it looks like a Snickers, but the wrapper says "CHORTLES" and it's bright purple with orange stripes. "Want to try one of these, now?"
Bucky: (I’ll let that laugh lie.)
Bucky: (I’m definitely capable of earning my own.)
Brina: "Obviously that's why you've just gotta have some sort of Enlarging Ray on hand!"
Rira: Rira's hand slowly lingers in the direction of the candy bar
Rira: "Wait... This is a bad idea, why am I doing this?"
Rira: Rira's eyes turns into spirals, before she mechanically takes the CHORTLES candy bar
Rira: When she's back to, she shrugs
Rira: "Oh well, it is not like I got much to live for anyways." She then tosses it into her mouth, wrapper and all, and begins to chew
Brina: "Oh I'm sure you'll be fiiiiine"
Ryusui: <@!Rira>, the bar is the finest chocolate you ever tasted. Including the wrapper. It also makes your entire body stretch and squish like it's made of taffy, with accompanying cartoon "boink" sounds, until it finally settles on making you into an eight-foot-tall beanpole.
Rira: Wait
Rira: Rira was already tall to begin with
Rira: uh oh
Ryusui: (would you prefer you became an eight-foot wide pancake? XD)
Rira: (Whatever is funnier)
Ryusui: "Enlarging ray...enlarging ray...eureka!" The Professor whirls around and starts scribbling plans on scraps of paper. "I've got the idea of the century! Just you wait, Mitch!"
Ryusui: (let's stick with the beanpole XD)
Ryusui: (like net effect: you are somewhat taller than you were, and also quite a bit thinner)
Rira: "Wait. I lost some weight..."
Rira: "This bar is amazing!"
Brina: "Do you have any fizzy lifting drinks to steal? With the way things are going around here that sounds like a smart move. Assuming I wanted to end up with a chocolate factory or something."
Rira: "Except I am EVEN THINNER than before!"
Rira: "I want a refund."
Ryusui: (take your laugh, Brina)
Bucky: Bucky walks up to the real Mitch. “Hewwo dere! Do you know where duh cwass gwoup is wight now?”
Ryusui: "THE IDEAS KEEP FLOWING, MITCH! THE IDEAS KEEP FLOWIIIIIING!!!" the Professor howls.
Ryusui: ( <@!Bucky> the duck test subject vanished when the Professor turned on the ray zapper thingy)
Bucky: (Oh.)
Rira: (Also, before that)
Rira: (He mentioned his name was not Mitch)
Bucky: Bucky walks up to the last person the professor called Mitch. “Hewwo, Mitch! Dere awe a lot of Mitches hewe! Do you know where duh cwass gwoup is?”
Bucky: (I think that would be either Brina or Rira, depending on if that last one was aimed at Brina in particular.)
Ryusui: (that'd be Brina)
Rira: (Brina)
Rira: <@!Brina>
Ryusui: (he's "getting these ideas" but not really acknowledging they're coming from people in his vicinity)
Ryusui: (and yes, whoever he thinks is his research assistant is "Mitch")
Ryusui: (this may change from moment to moment or even in the middle of a sentence)
Ryusui: ( anyways <@!Brina> <@!Bucky> asked you a question)
Brina: Brina sways her tail, "Gonna get an F on your paper for plagiarism you goof" and she blinks and turns to Bucky, "The name's Brina, actually! And how do you know this -isn't- the class group?"
Ryusui: (oh my)
Rira: "If this is a class group, who's the teacher...?"
Rira then rubs her chin for a moment, before going
"Not it!"
Ryusui: (i will give Brina a laugh just for being clever enough to play along)
Ryusui: (let's see if this gets Mr. Birbingham on anything resembling the same page as everyone else XD)
Bucky: “Oh no, now duh teachuh’s duh one dat’s lost! We gotta find’em!” He starts waddling off.
Brina: Brina uses her big tail to block the way, or try to anyway, "It's independent study! I guess"
Rira: "Uuuh..." Rira starts looking over to the Platypus "Mr. Screwball! Are you a teacher?"
Rira: (wait)
Ryusui: (no no, Bucky is "Mr. Birbingham")
Ryusui: (yeah, good catch XD)
Rira: (FIXED)
Ryusui: "Mitch, Mitch, Mitch, how many times do I have to tell you? I. Am. A. Professor. That makes me a teacher to all mankind!"
Rira: "That counts. He's the teacher now."
Brina: "Totally a teacher"
Cecil (and Laz): "You're a pretty bad teacher if you don't know what your outcomes are." Cecil says, keeping her eyes closed, still looking like she's upside down.
Ryusui: "SCIENCE is exploration!" the Professor says, finger triumphantly pointed at the ceiling. "Why, what would the point in exploration be if all you did was travel places others had already charted? Would Christopher Columbus ever have discovered Antarctica? Would Neil Armstrong ever have set foot on Mars? I think not!"
Rira: "Also, being a professor makes you a teacher to an university, but not all toonkind, but whatever." Rira mumbles under her breath
Ryusui: "So who wants to test drive more fantastical taste sensations from places where sentient life as we know it evolved from grapefruit, eh? Or where there's three moons in the sky and all of them are made of tofu?" He holds out an entire armful of weirdly-colored snacks and candies.
Bucky: “Mama says nevuh take food fwom stwanguhs.” He blinks. “But you’we a teachuh, an’ I guess dat means you awen’t a stranguh, so okay!”
Rira: "I'm... Doing diet from now on... Maybe... Hmmm..."
Ryusui: He gives you a pack of Dummies. They're like Smarties, but in intense shades of red and black instead of pastel pink and white.
Rira: Rira looks at her incredibly thin frame
Bucky: He takes out a singular dummy and starts licking it. “A-one, a-too...” CRUNCH “Thwee!”
Ryusui: (Bucky if this was a new scene that would be a laugh)
Ryusui: <@!Bucky>, the Dummies have an intensely sweet flavor with a bit of heat. They also turn you four feet wide, four feet tall, and inside-out.
Bucky: (Ew...)
Rira: "Y'know professor, do you have something that will make me shorter and wider-" Rira's eyes widen at Bucky's state "Nevermind I don't want anything."
Rira: "That's some ||BLEEP|| up ||BLEEP|| man!" Rira lets out "Are you going to leave him like this?!"
Rira: "Cut the cameras!" Rira's hand reaches towards the fourth wall "Or pull it away, I don't care which! I thought this was a children's cartoon! I don't get paid enough for this!"
Ryusui: "You want me to turn him back, Mitch? But there's so much SCIENCE I could do with him like this!" He looks crestfallen, but relents: "Fine, fine. You'll just need some Zarkoosian bark scrapings. Unfortunately, I used the last of the ones I had for SCIENCE, but never fear..."
Ryusui: He whips out a contraption identical to the one the first "Mitch" was wearing when he vanished.
Ryusui: "...this will take you straight to Garplex-17, the only place in the multiverse where Zarkoosian trees grow!"
Ryusui: ( <@!Brina>, i should point out, you're the only one who hasn't been transformed~ )
Brina: ( I'm too genre savvy! )
Brina: ( in actual transformation-centric chats I'll be the person who's like, sorry I'm sure those cookies are great but I'd prefer to be a squirrel here )
Ryusui: (i'm saying you might wanna take point on this XD)
Ryusui: (also if you don't remember, the device is a fancy helmet gizmo)
Ryusui: (think of the thing Doc Brown's wearing when Marty first meets him in 1955)
Brina: Brina boops the professors's nose with her tail, "I'm fine with silly harmless changes but that's a bit too far. You've gotta fix that, at least!"
Ryusui: "Glad to see you volunteering, Mitch!" He wastes no time putting the Einstein-Rosen Bridge Collimator on your head. "Now, your friends all might wanna hold hands, and, er, stay in a tight circle. I'm not 100% sure how big a wormhole this thing generates!"
Ryusui: He puts his hand on the lever.
Rira: "No, no, no! You gotta fix him! We can't have him on camera until you fix him! I am breaking character to say this! Four feet wide, four feet tall? Who cares?! Inside-out?!?!?! He can't even speak!" Rira says, flailing her arms around frantically
"And I don't like breaking character, because I am actually a huge ||BLEEP||!"
Rira: "Do you know how to do chiropractic stuff, professor? Just... Pull him outside-in back again, we'll look away while you do it!"
Rira: "I assure you, we won't want to see you doing it."
Rira: "... Maybe he can speak, which makes me wrong, and this even more gross, but still! Please!"
Ryusui: -CONTINUITY EDIT-
Ryusui: <@!Bucky> is still an approximately four-foot sphere, but is not inside-out anymore!
Ryusui: <@!Brina> still has the gizmo on her head, and Professor Screwball is about to activate it!
Rira: "Well, I am glad I didn't get to watch this get fixed." Rira then turns to the camera "And you should too."
Rira: Rira then grabs Brina's hand "Now that we are way more comfortable being here. Let's move on"
Rira: Rira then scratcher her chin at the wording
Brina: "The other people are coming with me too, I hope? I'm fine plunging into probably made-up worlds but I wanna keep the party in one piece while I do it"
Rira: Rira grabs <@!Bucky> with one hand, and the two of <@!Cecil (and Laz)> with two others, having four arms finally paying off.
Cecil (and Laz): Cecil and Laz keep quiet and they look at Rira, "...So huh."
Ryusui: "Three, two, and, uh, what comes next...ONE! Ha ha! I am a genius! FIRE!"
Ryusui: For a second, it feels like you all disintegrate. You very well might: you're being shunted through planes of reality not meant for mortal minds to process. After what could be a single moment or a thousand eternities, you all come out under a pale yellow sky, the air smelling faintly of burning tires, surrounded by vivid purple vegetation, and a persistent taste of blue in your mouths.
Rira: Rira smach her lips "Well, this is the first time I actually taste it, and not feel it all over."
Ryusui: "HEEEEEEY! HEY, HELP!"
Ryusui: The voice is shouting from up one of the nearby trees.
Ryusui: ( <@&547919574188687363> )
Rira: ( I can't continue alone )
Brina: Brina steps toward the tree and looks up, calling back, "Don't tell me it's a cat stuck in a tree or something?"
Cecil (and Laz): Cecil and Laz look at Rira and Brina, "Well, one way to find out."
Ryusui: It's the duck whose name isn't Mitch. And he is stuck in a tree.
Brina: "Okay that's easy, I guess someone could catchy you?"
Rira: Rira walks over to the tree, looks at the trunk and puts her hands to it
Rira: "So, anyone wanna shake the tree or is it just me?"
Ryusui: (Rira, go ahead and shake away)
Rira: "I'll take the silence as a yes."
Rira: "Because I am an ||BLEEP||."
Rira: wait
Ryusui: -SHAKE SHAKE, SHAKE SHAKE-
Ryusui: The duck immediately starts screaming as he tries desperately not to fall.
Ryusui: To absolutely no avail.
Ryusui: You dislodge him from the tree. Anyone volunteer to catch?
Rira: "You can't fall beyond the ground, I've tripped and fallen before and survived."
Brina: Brina tries to use her big fluffy tail to provide cushioning!
Ryusui: And you provide the perfect landing spot, Brina.
Ryusui: "Oof. Oof. Jeez. Thanks for giving me a heart attack," Not!Mitch quacks. "Hey...hey, you got the Professor's thingy!" He points at your helmet. "Quick, you gotta get us outta here!"
Brina: "Yeah that's the plan! Once we get whatever macguffins we need to fix everything"
Rira: "Is this the tree with the MacMuffin (TM)?"
Rira: Rira says, patting the bark of the tree before her
Ryusui: "I have no idea what you're talking about!" the duck quacks desperately, jumping at your stylish metal hat, trying to pull the lampshade-like cord dangling from the side. "We gotta get outta here, quick!"
Ryusui: For whatever it's worth, the duck did scrape the bark as he came down, and there are some shavings of it stuck to his back...
Rira: "Eh, whatever, I'll pull off a branch and he can figure it out once we are back. If we did it wrong, then he shouldn't have sent interns."
Rira pauses, a bit of a swirly spirals are seen in her eyes
"We are interns, right?"
She then shakes her head, and pulls a branch off the tree, before going over to Brina
Brina: "We're whatever! But yeah, let's get back and hope he makes good on his word"
Ryusui: -KA-CLICK!-
Ryusui: The voyage is no smoother the second time around. For a brief moment you're pretty sure your minds were all switched around at some point, but normalcy takes back over in short order. Except <@!Brina> is still faintly sure she should have wings and <@!Rira> finds herself trying to swish a long tail she doesn't have.
Rira: Rira swishes a long, fluffy tail
Ryusui: "Ah! Mitch! You made it just in time!" the Professor says, grinning broadly. "Are you ready to help me make SCIENCE-" "NO! FORGET IT, GRAMPS!" the duck yells, cutting him off. "I'm outta here! Good luck with this guy!"
Ryusui: The duck whose name isn't Mitch storms out the door.
Rira: Rira, stops, and reaches over to her rear, trying to see if she trully was without tail...
Ryusui: Nope, your backside is unchanged.
Ryusui: The Professor looks forlornly at the duck as he leaves, then turns back to your group, grinning: "All right, Mitch! Are you ready to help me make some SCIENCE?"
Rira: Rira hands over the branch to the professor, almost throwing it at him
Rira: "Catch."
Rira: "And, turn us back to normal."
Rira: "Then fill our paychecks."
Rira: "We're overtime by now."
Ryusui: "Oh? Oh! This is a Zarkoosian branch! I could make some amazing SCIENCE with this..." He wrinkles his nose and surveys the group. "What in Isaac Newton's name happened to you?"
Ryusui: (Last lines, folks?)
Rira: "I... Got a job. It does this to me... I think?"
Ryusui: (any other <@&547919574188687363> got anything to say? XD)
Brina: "Where's my darn chocolate factory for my efforts?"
Ryusui: (and with that let us...)
Ryusui: !end
